Squirrels and Interviews (a/k/a Be Careful What You Wish For)

No, not squirrel interviews! That would just be weird. Besides, what would they talk about? Nuts?

However, watching the squirrels who cavort outside my window reminds me of how lucky I am to be unemployed right now. I know, that sounds crazy, right? Most of the time, I walk around wondering “when am I going to get a job, when am I going to get a job?” But on days like this, when the weather has turned cooler (71 is cool in SE Texas!), and the squirrels are playing and burying their nuts, and I’m working on my laptop, looking out the window at the beautiful oak trees in my yard, I wonder “how long can I stay unemployed, how long can I stay unemployed?”

All of this oak tree/squirrel nirvana may be coming to a close for me, though. Maybe. Remember, I’m cautiously optimistic, right? Tomorrow, I have interviews from 2:00-5:00 PM for a job as a Sr. Training Specialist in an academic setting, and it’s a position in which I am very interested. I’m excited, but I’m trying to temper that excitement somewhat. It’s also the first real lead I’ve had in the three months I’ve been unemployed. I’ve had phone interviews, and even a few in-person interviews, but nothing has panned out. Friends tell me that’s because those weren’t the jobs for me, but it did have me down.

A couple of weeks ago, though, something in me changed, and I started to feel lighter and more hopeful – just a little – and maybe that little bit of optimism has had an effect on things. It seems far fetched because all I did was submit my resume online like I normally do, but in the last few days, I seem to have more real, tangible leads. Not only did I get a phone interview for the job I just mentioned, but last night I received two emails for two other jobs, and they want to set up phone interviews, too! And one of those jobs is one I could potentially be excited about (after I hear more from the hiring manager).

I’ve counseled friends about the power of positive thinking, but I don’t think I’ve really been believing in it myself lately. And I haven’t been believing in myself lately, either. A few weeks ago, I told my friend Jonathon that I felt like I had lost my mojo and he told me I hadn’t lost it, I had just temporarily misplaced it. And I think he’s right; I had misplaced it for a while. I felt so confident in myself and my abilities at Jones Day… I knew what I was doing (most of the time) and I was really good at my job. When I lost that, I lost a little piece of myself, I think, or at least misplaced it. (We won’t even go into tying up too much of our identities with our jobs right now.)

So, of course, now that things are starting to percolate and it looks like I might be closer to finding a new job, I’m a little anxious. What if they don’t like me? What if they do like me? What if I get the job and I hate it? What if I like it? Who will eat lunch with me? Will the work I do there be as good as it was at Jones Day? What if I fail? What if I succeed?

What if I’m great?

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